Hour 13 (6-7 p.m.): Try Not to Think About It, But Martha Logan and Aaron Pierce Are Probably Doing It

Oh. My. God. The world has turned topsy-turvy.

She looks like she's seen a ghost. Maybe she has...


Little Ricky Schroder is playing an a$$hole...


…and Martha Logan goes haywire!


Or should I say HAIRWIRE?!

Some observations:

1. Ever notice how everyone at CTU has some kind of history with someone else? Now there’s tensions between Silver Spoons...


...and this guy.


Gimme a break! All this bad blood is overkill! What's next? Bad blood between this guy...


...and the head chef at the CTU commissary?


2. Really liked the way the dead guy conveniently broke Jack’s fall. It’d be nicer world if there was a dead guy there to break our fall every time we fell on our a$$es.


3. Plain and simple: Doyle’s an a$$.


Even plainer and simpler: the bigger the a$$, the smaller the guy's tallywhacker. Had we seen what Doyle drives, we would've known beforehand what a small-membered jerk he was:


4. Is Veep Daniels not the biggest SATAN around?!


He left me actually feeling sorry for Tom Lennox. Someone get some smelling salts and wake up President Wayne Palmer, for God’s sake!


5. Just think, at the Meadowcreek Insane Asylum, I mean, Day Spa, where the slogan is “Where the wealthy lose their marbles every day,” Aaron and Martha’s day probably got off to a fairly good start:

pinochle...


...meds...


...lawn darts...


...spinning class...


...meds...


...4:00 buffet...


...stab the ex-husband.


What mayhem!

6. Didn’t Aaron Pierce look all trim and slim?


Hitting the gym between Martha’s lithium cocktail...


...and electro-shock spa treatment...


...is apparently doing the man good! When Logan arrived, Aaron should’ve stuck in his head in the door: “Honey, the ba$tard who slapped you on the tarmac is here!”


And believe me, if you’ve ever been slapped on the tarmac, it hurts like hell!

7. Love, love, LOVE Jean Smart! She ROCKS! Absolutely delightful the way she maniacally sliced up that kiwi fruit.


Very testicle-like, but WAY TOO BIG to be Charles Logan's.

8. Jack’s got such a great way about him, doesn’t he? Especially when he walked in on Boris and Natasha, the two Russian lovebirds...


Nothing says “Pardon me,” like “I won’t hurt you. I may kill you, but I won’t hurt you.”

And then the wonderful frenetic, whacked out climax of the show, with Martha stabbing Logan in the neck with her favorite kitchen knife.


OH. MY. GOD! Wasn’t that just gratuitously delightful?! It was like watching June Cleaver take a sharpened spatula to Ward out on the front lawn.


Disturbing, yet morbidly watchable! We knew something was going to happen, but WHO KNEW?! And then for her to sit there, handcuffed, and say, “What the…? I shoulda been given a medal!” Priceless!

Of course, if she had offed the Prez a few years ago, we might not have lost David Palmer in the first place. Good lord, if she had it in her to help Aaron put a dead federal agent in the trunk of her limo...


...she surely could’ve found the time during Logan's early political career to grab something sharp like a letter opener...


...or one of those fancy state dinner toothpicks...


...and stick it in Charles Logan’s jugular while he was sitting on the toilet. Would’ve saved us a lot of trouble!

Next week:
Martha Logan does get a medal of sorts...


...while Milo and Silver Spoons try to settle their differences with a team-building CTU Dance-off!